To dad.

It’s Fathers Day in the UK. A day to let your dad know you care by means of a card and usually a Gillette shaving set.

As I laze in my bed minus card and present I reflect on everything my dad has done for me and what he’s been through.

So I thought id write an Ode to my dad Mike. He’s really bloody annoying at times by the way, stubborn moody maybe a bit like your dad. But I’m certainly not here to berate the guy on his special day.

I’m going to take you back in time.

When I was 21 I was engaged to be married and pregnant. Oh and my mum had just died of a grade 4 brain tumour. One day we were a normal family unit of 3 and the next my mum was told she had terminal cancer. My mum was my dad’s world, they did everything together since they married in 1966.

He was deveststed. 😦

Somehow he defied most of the doctors and brought my mum home to care for her during the 1 year of her illness. It was gruelling and exhausting as my mum gradually declined in to needing help with even basic things. I’m ashamed to say I was often absent as I could not deal with seeing my mum the way she was – something I will live to regret for the rest of my life.

When my mum died in November 2001 I was 5 months pregnant and heartbroken. But my dad was distraught and I can’t imagine the pain And anguish he felt losing someone he loved for 35 years. Things got dark for a while, I can’t speak of them
publicly but it was very sad emotional time seeing my poor dad grieve.

Miraculously I had my baby a few months later and began my own family life and i guess life just carried on.

13 years on, 1 marriage and 2 children later, I’m diagnosed with cancer too, so my dad (the glue that holds everything together), looked after me when I was too ill to look after myself and the kids.

He never showed any emotion when I had cancer but I often think he was dying inside and was probably more frightened than me.

Miraculously, I’m still here a year on – I made it through. This Father’s Day I’m going to hi five my dad and just let him know I appreciate him. Parents should be cherished because you never know how long they’re going to be around for.

In the end, hopefully when you’re old, your parents will be gone and all you will have is memories. Make them good ones.

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