Being a survivor comes at a price.

It’s often easy to forget what I have and don’t appreciate. I’m so bad for doing this so I constantly have to remind myself of the great things in my life.

My mum died of cancer after just a year and here’s me still alive. Do I feel guilty for moaning to my dad all the time? Yes. But it’s not my fault she died and I can’t change that.

I am lucky to be alive I know this, and I’m thankful.

But being a survivor comes at a price with it’s own problems.

Should it be that I cant complain about how I feel because someone tells me I should be positive or grateful to be alive?

Its awful that people have terminal cancer, perhaps one day that could be me – god I sincerely hope not but my point is if you dont understand how someone feels and its alien to you, do you really have any right to pass comment?

Cancer is a very lonely experience and people struggle to talk about cancer and how they feel as it is.

I feel I’ve digressed. In an ideal world we would feel supported for whatever we are going through and then move on to brighter days.

The world can be hard and cold and even I could do with taking my own advice sometimes..

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