Comfortably numb

I was thinking how awful December was barring Christmas day and New years eve which were enjoyable but in general the whole month was pretty bad.

January on the other hand has been lovely. The calm after the Christmas storm and the annoying people who go over the top with their festivities and enthusiasm.

There is less small talk in January apart from the obligatory

“how was your Christmas?”

it’s pretty quiet.
I don’t really do small talk. It tires me out and it’s disingenuous. I would rather have a proper conversation, where I’m interested in that person and where genuine questions are asked because there’s real interest.  So in January I’ve noticed people have kept themselves to themselves a bit more which is ok with me.

My moods were all over the place last month but now they are ok and levelled. I can’t seem to feel much at all, sometimes I feel sad and want to cry about something but it doesn’t happen. I don’t feel like arguing or giving my opinion where as I would before if I thought it was firmly necessary. I suppose antidepressants are the general anesthetic of emotions.

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