I was thinking about how I like to talk and others do not like talking about anything especially where emotions are involved.
I’m on the other end of the scale. Open and able to talk about my feelings. Yes I find it hard and I always always want to slap myself afterwards but I do it anyway.
It’s cringeworthy talking about feelings because at some point society told us it is. We were taught to play the game give nothing away and it’s even harder for men. Men are somewhat conditioned to be masculine and hard and show little emotion. That’s why women are from Mars and men are from Venus we are distinctively different when it comes to talking about how we feel.
Just the words “we need to talk” are enough to make a guy recoil in horror. But at the same time a guy who was overly emotional would be annoying. I realise I have double standards here.
I would just like to talk to someone occasionally without them being freaked out or feeling awkward but then perhaps there is a happy medium haha I don’t know.
So anyway I know I haven’t touched on dating for a while, and I thought it best I didn’t see anyone considering I feel like a whale and look like a bag of shit without clothes (ok that’s harsh I know, I’m semi joking) also because before I went away I had a bit of a meltdown and was in a state and upset a couple of people which I do feel awful about but I realise when I’m pissed just how fragile and (I can’t think of an alternative word) damaged I guess.
Although funnily enough I am actually dating someone, I just don’t get very drunk and I don’t talk about the C word. But time will tell if he’s strong enough to handle me or if I stay interested…