a great philosopher once said that everything happens for a reason. This is what I believe now, at least I’ve convinced myself that it must be true as it’s kinder than believing you deserve a shit life. It’s the optimists way of thinking and it helps me to accept things and be less angry and upset about certain life events.
The bad things that happened all shaped me in to who I am today. Everything had a purpose. I still wonder why things had to happen to me though and I’m unclear about the lesson I learned about my mum dying for instance. it caused nothing but sadness. Yes I have a better relationship with my dad now but this does not compensate for losing her.
The whole cancer thing though is perhaps a little different. Cancer has obviously changed my life and given me great opportunities. I begrudgingly accept it had to happen but I’m still fucking angry about it sometimes. I still think it’s unfair. There was no real reason given other than ‘you’re just unlucky’ no shit Sherlock! But you’d never hear a doctor say ‘you have cancer because it was meant to happen to put you on a great path’
A complicated love life and my early childhood were messy and I’ve been unlucky there too, but feeling sorry for yourself just doesn’t work. It just eats you up and acheives nothing. It’s always good to remind ourselves of all the great things we’ve acheived through adversity. Big or small it’s all relevant and shows strength courage and determination.
Maybe it doesn’t matter about the whys that much. Whatever happened happened. It happened to you. You can be sad and angry about it or are you can try to make things better and love the life you live. Edit