I don’t wanna talk about it.

I’m such an advocate for people talking about their problems. Private people would call me an “over sharer”  I don’t doubt.  I suppose the worst case scenario is needing someone but feeling like you can’t talk to anyone.

It’s funny. I’m going through a really tough time, and I’d have normally wanted to offload. Alcohol would certainly be off limits due to me behaving like a knob and becoming an exaggerated version of my emotional self- aka a pain in the arse to put it nicely! 

And yet, I have found comfort in telling very few. In going out with my colleagues and not talking about my life and my problems. Just having fun. Enjoying food and copious amounts of booze. Good company helps you forget, and booze numbs the pain. 

You know It’s weird. We never stop learning about ourselves. You think you’ve got yourself all figured out but life isn’t always black and white and there is often more than one way to do things (even if it goes against our principles and morals).  

I’ve realised that talking to others about your troubles is not always going to make you feel better or give you that reassurance that we often so desperately seek. Sometimes talking to people actually makes things worse. 

Remember in the Wizard of Oz where Dorothy asks for help from the professor and the good witch of the North to go home to Kansas? The witch points to her feet and tells Dorothy that she’s been wearing the ruby slippers the whole time and she could have gone home whenever she liked but she had to go on this long-arse journey with her friends first before she realised she had all the power?

“You don’t need to be helped any longer, you’ve always had the power.”

Perhaps it’s a rather daft analogy but the point I’m trying to get at is-we don’t realise how strong we are until we try. We have the power to do anything we want to do and you don’t need others help and support all the time. You are self-sufficient and amazing.  

(FYI I’m still sitting it out)…


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