Disclaimer:If you do not wish to read about my lack of sex life you are free to exit the page.
Those of you who tune in to this blog regularly, will know about my annoyance re the whole men wanting sex instantly debacle. Yeah I’ve moaned about it before, and I’m going to moan about it again! (No pun intended)!
It’s not that I mind that men want to hook up and skip the dinner and the chat with other women, just not with me please.
I’m online like most other single people mostly because I’m bored, to window shop and mainly for an ego stroke -yeah I said it. Perhaps around 50 men a day message me and tell me how beautiful and amazing I am. Of course it’s not real. It’s just shallow and appearance based. They don’t even know me from Adam but nevertheless I like it because it makes me feel powerful. These men are fawning all over me mostly to get a shag- but it’s something they won’t get from me.
Now it’s got to the point where I actually use sex against these men. Even when I’m dating. Honestly now I’m so paranoid and worried that that’s it’s all they want from me, I withold it deliberately which has become a habit.
Maybe if so many guys were not online looking for hookups and being overtly sexual I wouldn’t have turned in to this bitch who rejects anyone’s advances even if actually they are interested in me and sex is just part of the package.
I need simulation of my my mind. I need that connection, that want to talk for hours, that feeling that we would never run out of things to say. And then and only then does sex feel like a natural progression. I like the slow burn. It’s so intense. I couldn’t possibly roll around in the sack with someone without not knowing who they are.
It might sound old fashioned but i will not succumb to pressure to be any different but maybe I need to not judge everyone with the same brush and give people a chance?